Kitchen Signs

Ring bell for maid service. If no answer, do it yourself!

I clean house every other day. Today is the other day.

If you write in the dust, please don't date it!

I would cook dinner but I can't find the can opener!

My house was clean last week, too bad you missed it!

I came, I saw, I decided to order take out.

If you don't like my standards of cooking, lower your standards.

It doesn't always look like this: Some days it's even worse.

If a messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, then this kitchen is delirious.

Thou shalt not weigh more than thy refrigerator.

Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves for they shall never cease to be amused.

My next house will have no kitchen-- just vending machines.